"Hey, it’s Uno — Professional Chewer Turned Reformed Citizen.

Look, I’ll admit it… I’ve chewed some things in my day. A shoe here, a blanket corner there, maybe a power cord once (you remember). Sometimes I’m bored, sometimes I’m itchy, sometimes the couch just looks at me wrong.

But my human finally found something that actually stops me — this No-Chew Deterrent Spray. One taste and I decided, immediately and with full conviction, that I had better hobbies.

It’s strong. It’s bitter. And it works.

No alcohol, no harsh chemicals — just natural bitters that make anything you spray taste like a terrible life choice.

Here’s what it helps protect:

• Hot spots and paws I keep licking

• Furniture I shouldn’t “redecorate”

• Shoes

• Power cords (apparently that’s a big no)

• Bedding

• Crates

• Basically anything I get ideas about

Ingredients? Simple: natural sour and bitter deterrents, anti-chew agents, and a punch of sour apple that I can only describe as… unforgettable.

If your dog’s like me — curious, clever, and occasionally destructive — spray this on and watch us rethink every bad decision instantly.

Uno approved.

Not because I like it…

but because it works."